Relationship Matters: Love, Respect & Compromise Part 1

Love is hard . But should it really be so hard?

A friend called me yesterday night. she was so sad. it has been a while we spoke. why? she fell in love and focused all her energy on that love. Life wasnt about balancing other friendships with her relationship. it was about him. First big mistake, but then. i totally love this girl and respect her decisions.

Before we go into her story ( she said i could write about it)

Every relationship have its downside. it is amazing that a girl or guy who complains that his / Her partner is too Quiet will find it that in another relationship all  one party want is for the other to be quiet. Just be quiet! do not talk so much and we would be fine. Yet, it is a problem somewhere else that someone is too quiet.

In life, we cannot have it all. The difference between our generation and that of our parents is that, they were able to manage better. Women in relationships back them automatically fits into the back seat and let men drive them. But to where? women these days are not willing to take the back seat. the thirst for equality is so real.

Quick Question:  Is a man meant to lead a woman?

To answer this question. we must first look at the term " Lead"

According to Oxford dictionaries, to Lead Means.

Show (someone or something) the way to a destination by going in front of or beside them:

To Show: Means you have to know
Destination: Take them somewhere, improve them
Infront of or Beside them: You can Lead by having the upper hand or by Holding that hand beside you.

Leadership does not necessarily means you have to be in front (or behind). You must be willing to lead and you must be willing to follow. No man is an island when it comes to knowledge ( My opinion).

Off topic: How do i get back to my friends story , Keep reading i will try. lol

A good leader i believe, is the one that give room for diplomacy.
A good leader does not believe in the showoff but in the job that must be done
A good leader is committed to the development of his subjects ( or Gf or BF as the case may be)
A good leader is not oppressive but accommodating
A good leader is confident .

It is not ok to try to suppress people just to feel good about your self. Oppressing others will not elevate you. you have to be down to keep them down

So back to the question: Is a man meant to lead a woman!

Yes. But he must lead her with care and not aggression.

- You will not take over her life
- You will not tell her what to do, how to act, what to eat,wear,drink
- You will not lead her by suppressing her. Let her Shine!

It is not wrong for a man to tell a woman how to do this or how to do that. But it is how he does it. Young men nowadays feel so entitled ( not all. apologies to the nice ones out there).

You young men nowadays want the old school kind of respect our fathers gave our mothers but you are not up to the task when it comes to loving a woman the way they did. 

You want your women to be financially independent but submissive. You dont want to pay for her hair, clothes, shoes,food etc. the way men in the past did ( and some men now) but you want the kind of Head and Tail love that our parents practiced. 

Letting her fend for herself makes her strong and self sufficient. So she is not going to come to you to ask you for money for this or that. Same way she will not come to you to ask you how much she should spend on her hair or her clothes.

Where is the problem? My Darling friend is dating an Old school oriented control freak :(

Watch out for part two!

Article written by : Dami
Photo: Google Images